Abducted by Aliens

Not sure where the time went. My last post was Friday and here it is Wedesday. I really must be losing it because Nancy asked me yesterday why I haven't been posting my blogs and it just hit me that I hadn't been. It is like it totally slipped my mind that I hadn't been doing that in the morning. Very wierd since it has become part of my morning routine for the last few months. Oh well, I am back at it now.

The kids and Dawn left on vacation this morning. They spent the night at Gene and Marshas and were planning on leaving by 4:00 am. They are headed to Niagara Falls but I really don't know much of the details. I know they are going to an amusement park along the way or somewhere close to Niagara Falls. They will be returning August 4th or 5th. (Not sure of that either.)

Work has been interesting lately. I ALMOST DIED!!!!!! I inadvertently plugged a server setup for a 110 ciruit into a 220 circuit. My hand was on the plug as I pushed it into the back of the computer. POP-CRACK-SPARKS-SMOKE!!!!! I new instantly what I had done but MAN it made me jump. Nancy said I wasn't close to death and that I am being melo-dramatic...blah, blah, blah. I ALMOST DIED!!!!!

The new student information system crashed in a big way. The whole system was down Monday and Tuesday morning until about 9. It is a very long story that is not very interesting so I will spare you the details of that adventure. It would even bore me to write it so I could hardly expect you to want to read it.

I have 72 computers arriving sometime this morning. Including the monitors we should be getting 144 boxes. What a blast.

Ok, here is a story that I think you will enjoy.

Last weekend I was at the grocery store and the place was pretty busy which is kind of the standard on a Saturday afternoon. I didn't have that much to pickup but it was enough to justify a cart. Jess and I were just finishing up and deciding which check-out line to go into. Most of the lines were full and had at least one other person waiting to put their necessities on the little grocery store conveyor belt. There was one line, however; that looked like out best bet but the person unloading his cart was less than desireable, at least at first glance.

We push our cart up to the end of the counter and put a plastic divider between his groceries and ours. So this guy, probably 275 pound, wife beater t-shirt, beard, and hair that looked like it hadn't seen soap in quite a few years. He wore sunglasses and sweatpants and sandals. Anyway, as he was writing his check, he lets out the biggest FART I have heard in quite a while. I mean, this is the type of fart only reserved for the bathroom after a big night of mexican food. I am pretty sure this dude left some in his underpants. The cashier kind of looked up and smiles as her cheeks flushed. The boy bagging the groceries walked away, for some reason in my mind it seemed that he ran but it had to be my imagination. The cashier to the right of us, turned around and started to laugh. The whole area around the checkout stands went silent as everyone looked at DUDE.

He acted like nothing happend then finally said "excuse me". He accepted his reciept, grabbed the handles of his cart and proceeded to the door. Now that is kind of a funny story but the smell that bastard left behind was nothing to laugh about. I mean, what could I do? I have all my groceries on the little conveyor and there are two people in line behind me. The smell was like a punch in the face. I tried to hold my breath but it was impossible. Jess freaked out and went outside and waited for me. You know it was at that time that I had a revelation.

I have smelled farts before, hell I fart and it stinks like hell, but there is something different about a stranger farting like that. It is almost like an attack. That bastard, farted and forced the rest of us in the area to smell his stink for the remainder of our stay.

I am glad I did not have many groceries and I got the hell out of there as fast as I could.

More tomorrow.